That Time Ortega Asked Strippers To Help Him Review A Movie For Children

There are few media watchers who would disagree with the assessment that through the years Tony Ortega has written a lot of garbage. We here at the blog have covered only a small fraction of the disturbingly half-baked ‘hot takes’ Ortega has pushed on readers of the course of his sham of a ‘career’ as a would-be newsman.

An eagle-eyed reader of this blog sent us an example of the sort of so-called hard-hitting journalism Tony Ortega was known for at the very height of his career, some 17 years ago – reviewing kids movies for a failing tabloid in Phoenix, Arizona. 

Today’s selection comes from Tony Ortega’s laughable review of the Disney film Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl.

This being Tony Ortega, who is nothing if not the sleaziest of creeps, he decided to invite sex trade workers from a local burlesque troupe called ‘Lezbosagogo’ to help him review the summer Disney film.

Let that sink in for a moment. That’s right Ortega’s strippers reviewing a children’s movie. Honestly, what is Tony Ortega’s obsession with children and the sex industry? 

If he is not actively defending the men who profited off of selling underage kids for sex, he’s working to let strippers to interpret Disney blockbusters to impressionable children. 

It’s enough to make you wonder what sick thrill Tony Ortega is getting from all this. Especially when you consider he begins his sexually explicit ‘review’ of the film with a quote from one of his strippers who described the Pirates of the Caribbean – again, a children’s film! – as “the worst kind of foreplay. The film asks you follow along, but it never gets you off.” 

Naturally, Ortega couldn’t resist adding that the stripper offered her opinion with what he grossly characterized as ‘a naughty smirk’. 

Nor does he stop there. Clearly reveling in his own wild inappropriateness Ortega reports with lustful glee how one of his stripper co-reviewers really enjoyed the movie produced for children because “the drunk women seemed really loose with the pirates…”

Look, by this point we all know Ortega is not the kind of person anyone would describe as ‘a good role model for children’ but this shocking bit of schlock proved to be a new low for even for a contemptibly tacky, low-class basement-dweller like Tony Ortega.

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