The Thing About Wednesdays

What is it about Tony Ortega and Wednesdays? We analyzed his last 5,210 tweets over the past 119 weeks and discovered the overwhelming majority of them seem to occur around the same time every Wednesday, typically in the late morning between 11:00 – 12:00.

Maybe this is the time the habitually unemployed rolls himself out of bed, dusts off the Cheeto crumbs and sets himself to the depressing task of exposing his micro-blog readers to yet another mind-numbing screed geared toward creating more bigotry in a world already awash in far too much intolerance already.

Without prospects on the horizon, and yet another failed schlep from the dank confines his underground lair to sunny Hollywood in the hopes of ‘getting his name out there’, Tony Ortega doesn’t seem to have very much going on for him lately.

This is why Wednesdays at 11:00 AM are so important to Tony Ortega. It’s the highlight of his week. It’s the only time he gets to pretend he has something important people will listen to. As days come and go and Ortega’s fortunes fail to improve we wonder how long it will take before Ortega realizes his fantasies of ever being taken as a serious journalist are as fleeting and substantive as a Wednesday morning coffee break.

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